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For COH & Their Spouses

In-Person

AZ, Tempe:
The purpose of the Children of Hoarders Support Group is to offer a safe environment where persons who have been negatively affected by the hoarding behaviors of their parent or …

MI, Ann Arbor:

1st Friday of every month, 7:00 p.m.
Trinity Lutheran Church
1400 W. Stadium Bvd.
Contact: Elizabeth 734-997-9688

 

WA, Spokane
Adult Children of Hoarders—Spokane Support/Recovery Group
Meeting the 2nd and 4th Tuesdays of the month
7:00pm-8:30pm
5025 N. Market (corner of Market and Queen In Hillyard)
Close to STA Routes 27-Crestline and 33-Wellesley

For more info:
Call 509-434-8874, or email at: achspokane@gmail.com

Announcement: http://bit.ly/ACH-Flyer
Brochure: http://bit.ly/ACH-Brochure

Online

COH & Spouses of COH (only) Online Yahoo Support Group. 2100+ members. Established 2006.
Affiliated with the Children of Hoarders site.

Adult Children of Hoarders Facebook Group. Created and maintained by a son of a hoarder.

Do you know of a group that should be added here?

Permanent link to this article: http://childrenofhoarders.com/wordpress/?page_id=475

  • Zmathieson

    are there any groups in California for children of Hoarders?

  • Zmathieson

    are there any groups in California for children of Hoarders?

  • Randi

    are there any groups in Ct. ?

    • Jamie

      Did you ever find out if there is a group in CT?

  • Ibby

    let me know if anyone wants to start a group in Houston, TX

    • Carethought

      I am the daughter of a hoarder and recentky got slapped with this reality… anyone to help where to start and get help is desperately needed… please contact me asap at carethought@yahoo.com

    • Anonemyz

      Also Houston, have been dealing with this for a long time. Would love to find some support/understanding/help; I feel I have exhausted my support systems ears and the crushing situation remains for me. Please let me know if a group has ever been started….tia!

    • Anonymous

      A support group meeting face-to-face in Houston would be a great idea. This book is of great help in the meantime, for those who live in an area without any support groups other than online. Stuff: Compulsive Hoarding and the Meaning of Things by Randy O. Frost.

  • Melisa_R

    I would love to start a group here in Southern Oregon…anyone?

  • Other areas where an interest has been expressed for in-person groups: PA & Toronto, Canada

  • Marissapensa

    I need help bad and I don’t know where to find it. My mom is a really bad hoarder. She hoards junk and animals. She has a 3 story house that is filled to the max.So much I don’t think there’s even any room for herself. She has now moved in with me and refusses to leave. She now has my house filled to the maximum. She has 8 cats here and a dog as well. I am very ill I have a low immune system and the filth and smell of the animals is just making me sicker. I am too sick to clean up after but even if I wasn’t there’s soo much stuff I don’t think anyone could. Please give me some advice.

    • Maria G

      Hi Marissa,

      What a terrible situation. The first thing you should do is take care of your health. The animals have to go. The best thing to do is find a rescue in your area who will come and take the animals away, give them health care if they need it and find them permanent homes.

      That’s really going to make your Mom angry. She may threaten to leave. Let her. Then hire someone to come over and sift through your Mom’s junk and your things. Your Mom is going to be even angrier but you know what? You are the one who should be mad! If she needs a place to live she’s is going to have to make space in her old house or live by your rules.

      My Mom is allowed to visit but she’ll never be allowed to stay because she won’t stop hoarding. I know it and accept it as angry as it makes me. The stuff and animals are more important to your Mom than your health, Sweetheart. She isnt going to change without deciding to do so and if she’s anything like mine that will never happen.

      You have been a good daughter and done everything you could to help her. Your life is important! Be strong and put yourself first now.

      • Bunnylvr562

        My Mother never stopped hoarding. She never saw how her behaviors hurt her children. She has been gone almost 4 years now and I am still fighting to sift through the emotional trash she has left me with. It is amazing to me how many children of hoarders support a hoarding parent when there is no signs of the hoarder wanting to get help or even realizing that what they’re doing is killing them. You are a beautiful human being who deserves quality in your life. Unfortunately, you may have to give up on the idea of your Mother snapping out of her sickness and becoming the supportive and loving parent you want and need.

  • Anonymous

    why doesn’t the COH forum work anymore? why was it taken down?:(

  • L.

    The Royal Oak, MI Group is now run by someone else.  Hoarders and any individuals interested in hoarding are allowed to attend. (This was the experience I had when I went). When I went, there was a hoarder and an interested community member there and it was *highly* distressing.

  • Lucysmama2005

    Are there any groups located in Iowa?

  • Schlag

    Are there any groups in northern Ohio?  I need help fast.  My mom is out of her house for knee surgery and her best friend just called me to tell me about the condition of the house.  It’s out of control.  I need to find help cleaning it out and getting her help.

  • Jenn

    My mother is a hoarder. She has been for as long as i remember . We had gotten her help and she seemed to be doing well. I went to her house this morning to find her wallet and car keys .. since she is the hospital due to health issues. I was horrified By what i saw … She has relapsed … It is ten times as bad as before . Not only is it so full of things…and trash .. now there are roaches crawling the walls in the day time .

  • Missie1570

    Where do I begin, me Missie and partner Shae has been in Houston for almost two weeks, 7 hours away from our son, family and home. We are here to help her adoptive mother due to hoadering, as soon as we found out the severity of it we came down and got everyone we could involved. Her mother is in great denial, angry at us for trying to help her, aps is telling us not to leave but we are in a great bind financially. As her partner does anyone have any advice how I can help her, support her more, anything.

  • myc

    don’t know if this will help but the book “buried in treasures” for her and “digging out” for you and her family/friends. it’s very helpful. then also go online and see if there are any services in her area that help.  if you can afford it an organizer that specializes in hoarding is very helpful and a counselor is essential.  make sure they have lots of experience in dealing with hoarders.  there might be a free service in her area. call anyone in the area  that specializes and see what they have to say. they are usually very helpful.  i made a million calls and everyone was great.  good luck

  • Disgusted

    DISOWN THEM PEOPLE! DISOWN them and TAKE BACK YOUR LIFE! You cannot save someone who does not want to be saved. These are people who have never had to FACE the consequences of their actions. Life needs to KNOCK some people to the ground. That’s how you get shattered AWAKE. That’s how you introspect. That’s how you are HUMBLED. Throw them in the fire and let God deal with them. 

  • J.

    Disgusted: That’s not a helpful way to deal with them. I know it’s frustrating, but they don’t want to be saved because they have a mental disorder; it’s an illness. A hoarder can’t always help it. Sometimes there’s a lot of delusion going on in their minds. That’s why a therapist who has experience with hoarders is the best option, since they can help you with ways to slowly convince the hoarder that they truly do need help. Disowning them will only make them spiral into more isolation and depression, and likely clutter their house more.

    • anonemyz

      Some people for a myriad of reasons love the parent too much, cant turn away because that’s not the person they are. Some people suffer with them, and ultimately for it. I cant, I’m that person, help or not (and mostly not), change or not (def mostly not), I will not leave my parent to break further alone. Help is a bonus, but support is the best i/we can hope for.

  • needaplantoday

    Most of the support is for the hoarder, who may or may not want any assistance. Living with someone who does not want help, who will not accept help, and who creates chaos and drama is very stressful. What “rights” do spouses and children have when living with a hoarder?. We’re advised not to move anything or throw anything out, because it will trigger distress and make the situation worse. So, what rights do you have? Not everyone accepts limits or agrees to ground rules. And with children involved, this becomes harder, because the non-hoarding parent doesn’t want the children to hear the arguments. Just wondering where to start.

    • AZGram

      I read your blog and know exactly what you are saying. Our daughter in law is the hoarder. Our son doesn’t want the children, 11 & 7 to hear his wife’s yelling and berating him when he tries to do anything. I have said that they have the common areas and she has her bedroom and bathroom, but that doesn’t work, does it. My son was gone for a few days and the kids were late for school…..he normally takes them. She does not cook, help around the house…..nothing. She likes to plan trips and activities for the kids. The 11 year old is a bright, beautiful girl. She has always been an A student, and now she is starting to be late with papers, homework, etc. I fear the worst for my grandkids and son. Have you found help? There doesn’t seem to be much available. They live in western WA in a suburb of Seattle.

  • sdhoarding

    Does Your Loved One Have Trouble Throwing Things Out? Have friends or family that save too many things? Your loved one’s house is cluttered with objects? If so, you may be eligible to participate in a research study on the experience of family members with hoarding. Please call Dr. Ayers from the Department of Psychology VA Hospital/ UCSD Department of Psychiatry at show contact info ext 858-552-8585 ext. 1251 or e-mail us at sdhoardingresearch@gmail.com for more information. The study will take place at the VA in La Jolla

  • rs

    Looking for adults that have had to move back in with hoarding parents. Seemed like a good idea to temporarily move back in with hoarding mom after 18 years; but after 2 months I am finding it especially hard to emotionally manage and wonder if it’s worth the mental anguish. I sacrificed a good job and home to pursue a different education/career pathway near my mother’s home. Though I’m grateful to have my mother to lean on for housing at this time; I do not know how I can make it another 22 months living in a hoarders house. I love my mother but I hate her stuff; I feel mentally and physically suffocated by the boxes and piles that tower over me.

    • JT

      I don’t think moving back in for any reason is a good idea. Hate to say it but I don’t think it’ll help her, and the financial advantage you’re getting is highly likely to be outweighed by the “mental and physical suffocation” you’re already experiencing. If it were me I’d live in a flea-bag motel alone before I would move back into a hoarder house like the one I grew up in. Good Luck.

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  • CORAL ROOT

    Good article, Thanks!