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Memory Lane

Trips Down Memory Lane

Quotes shared by children of hoarders:

Curdled Milk!

Numerous half filled bottles…of ketchup/mustard/pickles <insert food item of choice, half filled crammed into refrigerator haphazardly, with brand new ones crammed in there too

Fleas

Flea infestations that can’t be remedied because there are too many flea eggs/larvae hidden in the stuff!

Fly Strips Hanging down, slapping you on side of face (Guess where flies come from?)

Fruitflies–Almost as annoying as houseflies

Scabies–And being introduced to what “quelling solution” is

Maggots-Really don’t need a description–often found under the 15 year old sack of rotten pototoes, in the bottom of a pile

Filled freezers and fridges

Ovens used for storage, forgetting/not-knowing stuff in there, pre-heating the oven and having a “meltdown.”
(But of course it was *your fault*, because you didn’t check inside the oven first)

Broken Refrigerators Used For Storage-Repairmen don’t come in, so they stay broken and become…storage containers!
Hopefully food was removed, but often not, so they become……really STINKY storage containers and you pray the seal is a good one and keeps the bugs out and the smell in. Guess who (usually) finally gets the pleasure of cleaning them out one day?

When refrigerator not working, food/drinks put out on porch/other creative method to keep cold.

Meal Moths-Taking a spoonful of <insert food of choice>…and finding a meal moth in it! Pouring the cereal…<getting into crackers-flour-insert dried food of choice> and finding meal moths in it!
(Because they lay their eggs in the boxes)Want to read more about your old friends? Go here.

Mold-Making a nice tasty sandwich…take a bite…then you look at the sandwich in your hands and there is mold on the bread! <insert same scenario for cheese…juice…donuts, etc.>GAG!

Loading up the extension cords and power strips

Bedbugs

No Running Water-Having to lug buckets of water to flush-Bathing at the kitchen sink

Ironing Boards–Using the ironing board(s) for teetering multi-storage

Clothes hanging on the shower rod, on top of door frames

On Christmas and birthdays…Being told when opening (trying to open) gifts with childhood wonderment:
“Don’t rip the wrapping paper!” “Save it, it’s still good!!”
“DON’T WRINKLE IT-I can reuse it!!” “DON’T WRECK IT!” “Save that bow!”

Lots and lots of cleaning supplies-hoarded and not used

Micromanagement-…of what we are doing, especially when trying to help them.

…Standing over us or pulling up a chair to sit there and watch…while critiqueing.

3/2010, sent in by site visitors:

Piles upon piles of coupons and newspapers “to be looked at later”

My 20 year old prom dress with the fresh aroma of moth balls.

Not being allowed to throw your OWN stuff away

Apr 12 2010:

Any of the 26 (mostly feral) cats I was forced to live with during my teen years, and being told that finding them new homes, going to the pound, or humanely removing any of them of was “like getting abortions”. Never mind that most of them never saw a vet, never got shots, never were spayed/neutered to prevent further multiplication, and many never even got a name… and one of them, who spontaneously died sitting under the coffee table, ended up in our apartment complex’s dumpster.

Apr 15 2010:

omg-thank you to whomever posted the wrapping paper comment.I insist my children rip the paper but i still feel guilty if i don’t carefully remove the tape ever so delicately to this day. Years of artfully unwrapping gifts have engrained a style of unwrapping gifts only COH’rs understand. I do sometimes rip paper myself but a twinge of guilt always surfaces at this glutenous extravagance.

Apr 27 2010:

I was terrified of my house catching fire. A normal rescue would be made double by the mess. I ate meals with a melon-baller or apple corer or with my fingers because there was never clean silverware. I remember silverfish, centepedes, spiders, fleas, mice, flies and maggots. The bathroom was covered in black mold- pieces of moldy grout used to fall into my bathwater. I partially cleaned her out about two years ago at her request (as a “mother’s day present”) and filled a 25 foot dumpster. While there, I discovered that one of her 13(?) cats had had kittens on the carpet and she hadn’t cleaned up the placenta… but my mom won’t even let me come to her house anymore…

Apr 24 2010:

Wow, like a few people I wasn’t embarrassed. It is was it is… and still is at the moment. I’m so glad I found this site as I am a child of a hoarder. I’m almost 30 myself & my mother is still hoarding on the side. 10 Years of storage before we got it cleaned out. Then 6 months go by, another unit & everything put back in again. Now it’s been almost another 10 years… YIKES! Now after numerous years, a blessing in disguise, we now have to empty it out, manditorily. Storages are blackholes for money especially when you are not using anything inside at all. Thanks for all that you do!

Jul 21 2010:

Nothing here has surprised or shocked me. I can imagine my mother doing many of the things I have read on COH. I am 43 now and have lived with this directly and indirectly all my life. What I notice hasn’t been sai is how the disorganisation makes them late for everything so socially things become consistently embarrassing away from the home too! Money was tight for my mum when it started and she was low with my abusive father’s treatment of the home and family. He would smash everything up. I suppose she kept things in case she needed them because of that at first; he would tear all our clothes up for example. As the mess has progressed and the wedge placed between us widened, I became the’knowitall’. She is also very jealous and bitter about everyone else that manages ok; always a reason why it has been easier for them too. I wish I could find more on suppport for my emotional baggage. I feel shame, gulit, embarrasment, loss, neglect, unvalued. I worry if I might be the same because of anything I do that remotely resembles that behaviour. I’m not a clean freak thank God but I cant gauge whats normal either and so am always so hard on myself about my ability to keep house.

May 05 2010

My mother raised chickens in our kitchen. They started out as “peeps” in trays, then got bigger, louder and smellier. Then we had to construct a chicken coop for them to live in. My sister and I had to feed and clean up after the chickens. I stepped on a nail one day and had to go to the hospital to get a tetnus shot. I hated the chickens and the nasty chicken coop. My mother wanted to raise the chickens to save money on groceries. I was happy when we butchered them. Unfortunately, they were not tasty in any way and were quite small. The amount of money that went into nurturing them was probably more than it would have cost to go to the grocery store and buy some chickens on sale.

May 26 2010:

Cleaning Supplies-
Tons of bottles, boxes, etc of cleaning supplies. All unused and filthy on the outside.
“Icky bags” – my hoarder mother’s term
Filled with used Depends, dirty underwear, snot rags, etc. Hanging on door knobs.

Again, collected from the online support group for COH:

“These are a few of our least favorite things”….

1) plastic shopping bags

2) 50 lb catfood bags

3) individual condiments (salt pepper ketchup)

4) cardboard cup containers (drink carriers from McDonalds)

5) bread bags

6) duct tape

7) newspapers

8 ) 1 gallon milk jugs

9) Dept 56 “collectibles”

10) pens / pencils

11) batteries

12) napkins from fast food restaurants

13) bread ties

14) the maid who never came on Thursday

15) phone books

16) stacks of printed emails

17) empty boxes (just in case)

18) shopping bags full of other empty shopping bags

19) QVC packaging

20) travel brochures

21) brittle rubber bands

22) out-of-date “points” from food packages

23) 40-year-old chemicals

24) Stacks of magazines that one has to step on, thus honing your surfing skills

25) dead flower arrangements

26) free sheets of return address labels

27) bubble wrap padded envelopes

28) free samples of lotion/shampoo/anything

29) canned vegetables

30) VHS tapes (recordings of television)

31) used wrapping paper and ribbons

32) plastic deli containers

33) those DAMN plastic rings off of milk gallons!!!

34 Appointment cards for doctors, haircuts, etc

35) Silverfish

36) little calendars from realtors, insurance agents, etc

37) National Geographics-they’re collectible!

38) wedding favors

39) baskets of mismatched socks-“the mates are somewhere”

40) crushed rolls of wrapping paper

41) “collectible” toys from McDonalds happy meals

42) Beanie Babies

43) pet urine soaked rugs that “just need to be aired”

44) plastic canvas for crafting (yarn and cross-stitch too)

45) Receipts

46) used depends

47) construction sized dumpsters in multiples

48) avon, avon, avon, did I say avon?

49) cookbooks, cookbooks, cookbooks

50) bundt pans

51) ancient takeout food

52) hoard refrigerators

53) hundreds of medicine cups from the hospital

54) plastic silverware

55) christmas presents from years ago that were never given

56. Plastic plates -I still refuse to eat off of them

57. tupperware

58. outdated mice crap coated spices -still has rows and rows

59. old bulging cans of food-enough already!

60. freezers-don’ t open don’t open!!!

61. flea markets-used to like ’em

62. cookbooks-I have one modest bookcase of them

63. anything from grandmas house of horrors

64. antique stores-used to like these too

65. magazines-love National Geo- I throw mine away when done!

66. newspapers-must cancel subscription, thought I had time, I don’t

67. coupons-I hate hate hate Piles of coupons!

68. rotting pieces of reclaimed wood stacked in neat piles (rusty nails and all.)

69. crumbling reclaimed bricks and cracked concrete blocks (“gonna build an apartment building”)

70. chainsaws

71.plastic trays from frozen dinners

72. cereal boxes and empty cereal bags

73. cake mixes infested with bugs (“just a little extra protein”)

74. the smell of frozen stale bread

75. rotten potatoes

76. rotten onions

77. used toothbrushes

78. used disposable razor blades

79. yogurt containers

80. dried herbs hanging everywhere

81. junk mail

82. tiny scraps of paper with “important” notes scrawled on them

83. magazines

84. anything that the dogs have chewed up (it still might be good)

85. bathtubs too full of crap to actually use

86. a fireplace full of old credit card solicitations (they must be burned to protect against identity theft, but she only gets around to it once a year or so)

87. Tiny scraps of saved soap.

88. Rinsed (or unrinsed!) cat food tins *for recycling*.

89. Old clothes from the last 40 years or so.

90. Tools and other totally inappropriate things which end up living on sofas and floor space in the house.

91. Extras of things like toasters, kettles *because it was a good deal*.

92. Gadgets and items- especially large ones- that were fad buys (good deal) and used only a handful of times, then sit taking up counter space or floor space for years.

93. Dozens of salvaged electronic/electric al equipment such as computers, mini photocopiers (about a dozen!), TV’s etc.

94. Catalogues and brochures

95. Books especially bought from secondhand shop or book clubs

96.”The Lady” magazine

97. Newspaper cuttings about “Important Things” or recipes

98. Kitchen gadgets(especially when more than one of each item)

99. Crockery especially earthenware

100. Empty envelopes

101. Junk Jewellery

102. Shoes

103. Clothes that do not fit

104. Anything still in its wrapper

105. Shopping bags full of decomposing fruit

106. Little ramekins/teak nibbles trays/scallop shaped dishes/implements for eating lobster/baking tins and anything else purchased for elaborate entertaining

107. Empty cardboard boxes

108. Any items brought home from hotel rooms/restaurants

109. Anything bought as a present

110. Tea cosies (NB this is probably a UK specific fetish)

111. Plant pots

112. Interior of freezer/refrigerator (especially if switched off!)

113. Birthday and Xmas cards

114. Fleas.

115. Unused but too old to use, cleaning supplies

116. Large Plastic storage containers with no matching lids

117. Grass that goes in Easter /gift Baskets. Tinsel.

118. bags of old newspapers

119. Hardcover Organizing books

120. Dolls & toys that come to life w/batteries where no children visit

121. Things children really needed at one time, but were never given.

122. plastic potty trays(?) & pitchers from hospitals and nursing homes

123. unrolled ribbon & thread spools around wire hangers

124. Dried up cat-o-nine tails retrieved from roadside

125. garages that can’t fit cars

126. 1/8 filled bottle of anything

127. carpets needing Shop-Vacs

128 wet cat food crusted on plates

129. Bags from Christmas craft fairs w/food & bugs inside.

130. spider sacs

131. Things from my childhood I’m very HAPPY to see, because then I falsely pretend I could care less about them, try to turn into a rock with no emotions, so I don’t encourage anything being saved

132. photographs in magazines

133. country-cutesy angel stuff

134. Clothes hanging on doorframes/showerrods

135. Cabinets that won’t stay closed

136. moldy oranges

137. Decorations, new, unused, crushed

137. plastic pots that plants/flower arrangments came in

138. tupperware with no matching lids

139. Bread crusts cut off and left on counters

140. Any maganize over 2 years old, especially Woman’s Day & Family Circle

141. things that fall off refrigerator door when opened

142. more than 2 potato mashers/other utensil in a drawer that won’t close

143. empty banana boxes

144. tax paperwork mixed with National Enquirers

145. Dead plants in bathtub. For decades.

146. full, unopened bags from The Christmas Tree Shop, TJ Maxx, Walmart

147. Paperwork and photos teetering precariously on anything

148. More than 3 of the same spice in a cupboard

149. scraps of food saved for “squirrels”

150. Stuff with cats on it it

151. Things of MINE I’ve thrown away but appear again

152. fruit flies

153. Beanie babies that cost over $100 each with plastic tag protectors on them to guard “collectibility factor” that aren’t used for target practice or sandbags

154. car trunks with no room

155. things that are *probably* an antique and will be “worth a lot of money someday”

156. Unopened Reynolds Wrap, Saran Wrap & Ziplocs

157. making a delicious sandwich, getting ready to take bite, finding bread is moldy

158. Finding fleas on yourself at work (this happened at my first job when I was 14)

159. Paper bathroom cups left around half-filled with water and fleas

160. Earplugs

161. Dried cat s**t

162. Cardboard boxes

163. Outlet malls

164. Pantry moths

165. Pantry moth larvae

166. Mattresses without sheets

167. Christian romance novels

168. Those sticky, curly fly traps hanging EVERYWHERE

169. Starbucks cups with iced tea from the day before, or the day before that..

170. Phone calls from my dad at 7:30 in the morning

171. Phone calls from my dad at 11:30 at night a few days later

172. Willful unemployment, while I’m double-majoring and working 30 hours a week

173. Flea foggers

174. fast food bags

175. packets of ketchup

176. plastic spoons, forks

177. empty paper coffee cups/lids

178. empty food containers

179. miracle vitamin/supplement du jour

180. anything pertaining to “secret cures the FDA doesn’t want you to know about”

181. anything pertaining to “make millions at home”

182. anything pertaining to “take this pill and lose weight without changing your eating habits”

183. shredded up pizza delivery boxes

184. plastic soft drink bottles shoved under the bed

185. Flea-infested vacuum cleaner, such as the one my mother shipped to my sister.

186. Toy trains kept in boxes piled up higher than my head and not in a nice train display.

187. Cheap ugly dolls

188. Any collectible toys that will “someday” be worth “lots of money” but don’t speak to any interest of the owner or will never be given to a child to play with.

189. Dust. Inches thick.

190. Piles and piles of shopping bags, paper or plastic, doesn’t matter.

191. Ants marching along the same path in the bathtub for *years*

192. Did I mention dust?

193. Large dogs that are badly/not trained to behave in the house. You shouldn’t have to crate a 6-year old dog!

194. Buckets that the sink leaks into, which overflow if not emptied every 2-3 hours.

195. Load-bearing books/leaflets/catalogues with SHINY friction-free covers, 2/3rds of the way down a pile that you have to walk past ten times every day. Woe betide you if you brush against it even a little! Down it all comes and has to be put back just right before Mum comes out of Her Kitchen to see what you’ve done now.

196. Black-encrusted carpets in those spots where you have to tread.

197. Knowing that something you need is either in this pile, this pile or this pile – and you’ll never be able to check through ALL of them before Mum comes out to see what you’re doing. “It isn’t in there! You don’t need to look in there! You’ll – see? I knew that would happen! No, go on, leave it! Don’t touch it any more! I’ll sort it out.”

198. The little tiny moths.

199. Crickets!

200. Live or dead mice. The live ones make noise, but don’t use poison, use a mouse trap (where you can get to it later). The poisoned ones still die, but in the walls or the piles. The good thing is that eventually the smell will stop.

201. Trying to find library books you want to return so you can get something different.

202. Having to explain to the librarian that the book really is gone, and you just want to pay for the whole thing.

203. Worrying about your parents and their health or worse, a fire. (Now, not too much back then)

204. …the tune from ‘The Sound of Music”, ‘My Favourite Things” popped right into my head and stayed there. You know the one that starts off “Raindrops on roses and whiskers on kittens. Today while cleaning out the hoard and the house, while humming the tune, I rearranged the words a litte to suit my least favourite things.

205.
This form was submitted: Jul 21 2010 / 11:06:28
Having a back problem since 14 because I had to hang over a bath for years and wash my clothes by hand. Our machine never got fixed because Mum needed to tidy up to have someone in.

(To the tune of These Are A Few of My Favorite Things)
‘MY LEAST FAVOURITE THINGS”

Urine soaked carpets that are littered with faceas
Pools that are black, Wow heres a new species
That crawled out from that primordial sludge
Whats that stuff caked to the floor that won’t budge.

Plastic bags, magazines, paper and wrappings
A room stacked with unused goods, still in packing
Oh look here honey now heres a suprise
Used sanitary napkins from 1995

Oh no no no, just found my Fathers ashes
Tripped over a dead cat and fell on a mattress
Its moving, slimy and smelly and makes my eyes sting
These are a few of my least favourite things

Cigarette stains on the walls floor and ceiling
The smell is so horrible, I’m suprised were still breathing
Diabetic needles, nail clippings in jars
And under that mountain of stuff theres a car

Grass is six foot high, the plants become a rover
The pool and the fence, the house its all over
Cleaning the ceiling, got chemicals in my eyes
Ambulance was called, gee I hope I don’t go blind

Honey did you bring over the detonater
So I can open this quite large container
I wonder what it there, hand me the chainsaw
So I can cut us an emergency door

The lighting is faulty, airconditioners broken
When my friends turn up, not a word is spoken
We clean and we throw and into the hoard dive
Lucky there weren’t any sharp pointy knives

Ornaments, bottles and food rotting in freezers
and fridges and other appliances that seized
Went onto the verandah and fell through the floor
Honey I don’t think I can take anymore

When my back breaks
When my bones ache
When I smell real bad
I simply remember my least favourite things
And then I just feel sad (and go home)

205. Stacks of National Geographics from the 70s that haven’t been opened and read but that are still “worth something”

206. Dirty, unmended clothing that doesn’t fit but just needs a button or a zipper or a patch to be useful

207. Drawers that have broken the tracks because they are so full of stuff and now can’t be cleaned

208. Mice turds…

209. Persian rugs so covered with cat piss and animal fur that not only can you not see the original pattern on the rug but their worth must now be negative in value (although inlaws still claim they’re worth the thousands they paid for them…)

210. Countertops covered in canned cat food stench so that even if you could find a space, you wouldn’t want human food anywhere nearby

211. Dried garlic and chile chains hanging from the ceiling that are black with age

212. Drawers full of cosmetic products that will never be used

213. Electronics that have had their batteries erode(corrode? ) and leak but still might be salvageable

214. Loaded guns “hidden” throughout the junk in the house because “guns without bullets won’t save you”

215. Three large bins of stuffed animal toys for the dog, more than their six grandchildren have combined

216. the dead dog in the freezer who can’t be buried yet because the ground is still
frozen…

217. Snapple caps.

218. 52 DOZEN! Easter Eggs dating back to 1974

219.
plastic margarine containers annual reports from clubs you aren’t a involved in meeting agendas for meetings you’re not a secretary for school newsletters

4/11/2010
220.
Having to sneak clothes that don’t fit, or that you don’t wear anymore, to the Goodwill.

Being ordered to pray for rain when the landlord was working on the house, so he didn’t see what was inside.

Any trip in the car started with “I’ll have to clear some space.”

Not having access to the car for 2 weeks because both sets of keys were lost.

The kitchen sink was broken for 5 years because Mom didn’t want the landlord to see the inside of the apartment.

Being yelled at when I moved some junk so I could close the bathroom door.

Stacks of dishes on the kitchen counters. When I tried to put them in the cabinets, Mom screamed “If you put them in the cabinets, the cabinets will fall down!” She still kept buying dishes, and stacking them on the counters.

Dreading the annual church rummage sale, especially “Fill a bag for a buck” on the last day.

221.
4/15/10
Moving magazines to make space on the sofa to sit down. All the baking pans. The mouse scratching in the wall that was never addressed. I turned the radio on to fool him and make him think I was awake so he would be quiet so I could go to sleep. The same peach paint in my parents’ house from my childhood until I cleaned out all the mess after they died when I was 38. The “junk drawer” with all the thread wrapped around everything. The roach turds in all the storage areas. Not fitting any groceries in the cabinets because they were full of old rotten food. Grocery bags on the kitchen floor and in the car trunk. “Straightening up” when company was expected. My dad visiting with his friends outside always because the house was never tidy. The dirty clothes hamper filled with moldy things that never got washed. My mother fussing because my dad had moved something of hers to the garage and she couldn’t find it.

222.
Having to eat the slightly spoiled food that the grocery stores wrap in plastic on those styrofoam trays with a big
REDUCED ticket on it that a frugal, astute shopper (aka hoarder) could not resist buying.

also

having to use every teabag twice despite pointing out to my mother that they were only worth 2 cents

223.
This form was submitted: Apr 27 2010
Old Sears Catalogs from the 80s that have things we ‘might want to order’ from. Even though Sears obviously doesn’t carry those items anymore, and catalogs are obsolete/gone because of the Internet.

224.
This form was submitted: Jun 30 2010 / 19:54:39
broken down computer equipment

225.
This form was submitted: Jun 22 2010 / 06:01:26
Cigarette trays overflowing with cigarette butts. Not being allowed to empty them because there may still be one lit and could start a fire…like having them flowing over and burning holes in the wooden end table is different. Then picking up my pop can to take a sip only to find out your Mom decided to change it into her cigarette tray because the cigarette tray was overflowing. When I complained that she used my pop can she would yell at me it was my fault because the cigarette tray hadn’t been cleaned…yet I wasn’t allowed to empty it because it might start a fire.

226.
This form was submitted: May 05 2010 / 12:33:05
QVC Boxes – with brand new, never used items

227.
This form was submitted: Jun 03 2010 / 10:44:47
“After all the sacrifices I made for you, you are so unappreciative. Anybody else out there would be happy to have these things, I guarantee it.”

228.
This form was submitted: May 06 2010 / 23:47:28
Believing that if I tried harder, I could understand the logic of the contradictory rules (it’s better to leave it really messy than to clean it imperfectly! This stained, moth-eaten sweater is handspun alpaca! etc)

229.
This form was submitted: May 26 2010 / 10:15:29
Seeing dried up old cat biohazards and getting the excuse “I’m not picking up the cat vomit, crap, hairball, etc, from the carpet because it’s easier when it’s dry.”

230.
This form was submitted: May 18 2010 / 17:09:08
PAPER! So, so, so, soooo much paper!

231.
This form was submitted: May 06 2010 / 23:22:32
Those standout memories where you learn that cleaning gets you in trouble (and still, *still*, hoping for excited surprise)

232.
This form was submitted: May 27 2010 / 04:50:56
Rat poison and later finding half decomposed mice.

233.
This form was submitted: May 06 2010 / 23:15:04
“Well, it may be a mess, but it’s MY mess.”

234.
This form was submitted: May 06 2010 / 23:14:21
People watching: 2 a.m. at the 24 hour laundromat because it suddenly became the most important thing in the world to do 10 loads of laundry simultaneously.

235.
This form was submitted: May 06 2010 / 23:05:48
Making up excuses for why the phone was always getting turned off (“I think my dad paid TOO MUCH and the phone company got confused”)

236.
This form was submitted: May 06 2010 / 22:59:04
Discovering, by smell, that the cats had brought in a dead squirrel.

237.
This form was submitted: May 06 2010 / 22:55:03
The ambitious clothes sorting ritual – keep/clean, donate, trash – that must take place on the driveway due to space restrictions elsewhere. And the clothes stay on the driveway for a few seasons.

238.

This form was submitted: May 06 2010 / 22:47:26
Putting leftover food on the screened in back porch in the winter because the fridge was full, and my mom insisting that it was still good for the next couple weeks. And relatedly, finding food on the back porch that had been placed there the previous winter.

239.
This form was submitted: May 26 2010 / 23:07:50
Empty baby food jars, tin cans of bent rusty nails, cheap tools still in the package and rusted now because they’ve been in the damp cellar, wax paper saved from inside cereal boxes, more than 80 junk cars in the yard, piles of rusting scrap metal, milk crates full of cedar shingles and carpenter ants, old refrigerator drawers, old doors, old windows, old car seats, closets full up with his clothes and no room to put anything of anybody else’s, piles of books that libraries had thrown away, bits of cardboard from pasta and cereal boxes, twist ties, old fuses even though the house was converted to circuit breakers years ago, tires, tires, tires, ketchup/sugar/salt packets, pens that don’t work, containers of used kitty litter, old bills in the envelopes with SAVE written on them in red…

And then there’s having no hot water from age 6 to 16 because he wouldn’t fix it, and wouldn’t allow anyone else to, a toilet that didn’t flush properly for most of my childhood, heat in the winter at a minimum so that my fingernails were blue…

This was child abuse, wasn’t it?

Post a comment with your trip down memory lane! Maybe someone out there can relate…

Permanent link to this article: http://childrenofhoarders.com/wordpress/?page_id=121

  • Baby rats

    I rmemebr finding baby rats in my mother's closet. Don't know whee the Mother rat was, but the babies were newborn and nested in a pile of clothes and stuff she had accumulated

  • Anonymous

    Mother went through my bedroom wastebasket and chided me for throwing out anything usable (e.g., a piece of paper that was still blank on one side).

    Kitchen drawer full of saved string, carefully unwound from the tops of Kitty Litter bags.

    • Jenn77

      My mom still brings up the time she found 28 cents that I had just thrown away. 

  • Anonymous

    rusty tools.  so rusty that you could punch a hole in them with your finger.  but they are “antiques that someone would pay a lot of money for”

    of paper with notes from church sermons.  each of the millions of pieces of paper have some valuable number on them.  or how about old phone books, like from the 60s!

  • Jenn77

     Opening the front door all the way- memorable because it only happened once or twice…

    Conflicting feelings regarding recycling. On the one hand it was good for the environment, but on the other, it added a few steps to the already complicated process of throwing anything out. Filthy plastic bottles and tin cans needed to be rinsed off before they were put in the recycle bin. Why wash out the bottles and tins unless you’re ready to put them into the bins? They’ll just get dirty again sitting on the counter. The filthy plastic bottles and tin cans spilling over the counter onto the floor weren’t in the recycling bin because the recycling bin had been outside and needed to be washed. But before it could be washed, all the trash bins in the house needed to be emptied because if you’re going to go to all the trouble to wash the recycle bin, you may as well wash all the bins. But before you can get to all the bins, you have to just clear out the bags full of stuff in front of them. What’s in these bags? Bottles and cans that needed to be put in the recycle bin. 

    Those jerks who moved in next door- We never had this many roaches until they moved in and brought them here.

    All those piles were organized.

  • Jenn77

    Dozens and dozens of plastic containers that cat litter comes in.

    • Kate76

      My dad takes items to be recycled at their township’s recycling center and comes home with a new stash of those litter buckets because they’re “useful.”  This happens monthly.

      • Bcbates39

        They are useful but never get used

  • Please give me more information. I love it, Thanks
    again.

  • Argh

    Finding dirty used cotton swabs because “don’t you know this is how I save us money so you can have things – I reuse them”

  • gooben11

    – Wooden clementine boxes.
    – Lids from plastic containers to use underneath house plants to catch water.
    – Chasing meal moths with a hand vac.
    – Canned goods with expiration dates in the back of the pantry from 1997.
    – Trying to get rid of ONE ITEM in a sea of junk, only to be confronted about that ONE ITEM and wonder how in God’s name anyone could have possibly noticed a single item was missing.
    – Stacks of “barely used” paper towels and napkins for a second go.
    – Mountains of folded plastic bags.
    – Scrapbooking supplies – boxes and boxes of them – but not a single scrapbook?
    – “Scrape the mold off – it’s still edible!”
    – “The expiration dates are just suggestions.”
    – The superhuman improvement in hearing from 2 rooms over/upstairs/any other location when someone was snooping in one of the piles or forbidden rooms.
    – Stockpiles of cleaning supplies, post-its, ziploc bags, vitamins, supplements, diet food, condiments, sugar packets…
    – Donating something to Goodwill, and watching it magically reappear a week later.
    – Having to explain to friends why you can’t have them in the house.
    – Having to explain/avoiding explaining to people you are dating why you’re not ready for them to meet your parents.
    – Swap shops, yard sales, thrift stores.
    – Duplicates of the same book in stacks piled up right next to each other. (Hey, at least there’s consistency!)
    – Knowing there’s a ridiculously expensive vacuum cleaner in the closet that would be great for these destroyed carpets, but 1) we can’t get at the closet, and 2) it wouldn’t be worth our while to get it out to vacuum these few patches of rug out here.
    – Where are my diplomas?
    – Cribs are great for storage: they hold a lot AND you can see through the bars!
    – Hard-as-rocks marshmallows that we can just “heat up in the microwave.”
    – Giving up and buying a new dictionary with your allowance because you can’t get at the old one.  (pre-interwebs, that is)
    – Don’t rip the wrapping paper!  Don’t you know how expensive that is??
    – Letting your mother borrow your suitcase for a trip, and then returning to get it but… it’s been lost.  (A suitcase?  HOW CAN YOU LOSE A SUITCASE?!)

    I could go on for hours.

  • Karenskorral

    Many years ago my dad & I found old “Coke” advertisement signs. Might have been worth something, but they were rusted and we put them out for trash. My mom went out to the tree belt and took them back and said she was “saving” them. This was over 30 years ago and to this day they still sit under a pile of junk. It used to be an inside joke for me & my dad, but as the hoarding got worse, we just don’t talk about it anymore.

  • Guest

    My father kept floor to ceiling file cabinets of notes from his conversations with people.  One time he reminded me of something that I said when I was 10, which contradicted what I said during our conversation.  I was in my mid-20s, and it broke my heart that he couldn’t let go of anything.

  • guest

    My mother would have a vast collection of plastic containers in our kitchen that were “re-usable” (to her) when in reality, she would never reuse them again!

  • guest

    A living room that serves as a landfill for mountains of newspapers. Occasional avalanches and landslides occur. Newspapers almost covering the T.V. that my father just relocates and connects them to another mountain.

  • Guest

    Cleaning out each room of the house, multiple times, just to see it stack up to the ceiling again. Tripping over crap that slid from “the pile” onto “the trail.” Sleeping in a crib until 3rd grade when my sister moved away to college and I got her bed. Dad freaking out when he trips over mom’s stuff for the 1,000th time. Looking for school clothes in my “pile” because we never used dressers. Coming up with wild excuses why people can’t come in. Turning off the TV and hushing to whispers when someone knocked at the door. Mom putting things away for me “in a safe place” and never seeing them again. Losing library books, homework and traveling trophies! Using furniture that you can’t even see to navigate things by, such as “It’s on the dining room table,” that I never even saw until I was like 12. Squeezing in and out of every doorway in the house because of all the crap on either side of the door. Telling people to stop in front of the house next door when I got dropped off so they wouldn’t know it was my house. Getting to school and having a beetle crawl out the sleeve of my shirt. Nightmares about maggots and people seeing our house. And every birthday wish, falling star wish, etc. that I ever made was for a clean house. Until I realized it would never happen, then I started wishing for more useful things. 

  • Anonymous

    being so scared to death of your mother, that you keep the fact that you told your youth pastor’s wife about your family’s “problem” a secret… and watching said youth pastor’s wife being nearly brought to tears when you (secretly when no one was home) invited her into your house, which you’ve accepted as “normal”

  • Anonymous

    being scolded for attempting to throw away chinese takeout containers, after finding them in the back of the refridgerator with putrid-smelling contents. “we use those for storing leftovers! Throw out the food, clean the containers, and put them away!”
    and having 2 BIG kitchen drawers overflowing with takeout and “tupperware” containers. anything that’s plastic and has a lid, we save!!

  • Anonymous

    having dozens upon dozens of baskets of who-knows-what hanging from the ceiling in every room in the house

  • Anonymous

    being unable to clean your room because your mother’s junk has more space in your own bedroom than you do!

  • Anonymous

    having a friend’s father drop you off after a sleepover, and hearing his four year old son shout out from the car, “your house is disgusting!!” because the junk overflows onto the patios and sides of the house, under the overhangs, and in the yard covered with tarps/plastic wrap and bags/stored in plastic bins

  • Anonymous

    over-stuffed fridge and freezers, with food that hasn’t been touched for months/years

  • 1111111111

    discovering small piles of the metal tops off the frozen juice concentrate containers all throughout the house

  • Starfox

    When i was growing up my mom wanted to remodel our home. and
    at first it was ok she bought the stuff and projects would get started but
    never finished so the house was always “under construction” and then
    she started her EBAY business and bought so many things that we couldn’t walk
    and that our rooms would change around to wear you could find a comfy piece of
    floor or a tub. We didn’t have water for one summer our heat didn’t work another.
    She bought another building and filled it with stuff too there where mice ad
    bugs and we would spend our free time “cleaning” but it was just over
    whelming the stuff and rotten food. We had 8 people in our house and a dog and
    countless cats over the year. I experienced a normal life for a while..but I
    feel so bad for my younger siblings who have never lived a normal life. My
    little sister has never had a slumberparty. ..It

  • Brookengrace

    having to dig through the MOUNTAIN of “clean” clothes that lived in a chair in our living room for more than 15 years, After the cat has slept in and shedded all in it, and the dog has buried scraps of food in it. I did not dress myself from a closet or dresser drawer until I left home. Clothes were removed from a stinky, mildewed, overflowing hamper in the bathroom that also fit that description, and washed and dried. The whole load would be put onto that chair, on top of anything that may be there from the last time clothes were washed. The wrinkles were unspeakable, but I couldn’t access an iron or ironing board because of the hoard in the kitchen. I am almost 30 and still can’t fold or iron clothes properly. 

    The lack of life skills I had as a child..and now. Like spending the night at someone’s house (because none of your friends could stay with you) and not knowing how to make the bed after sleeping in it (as every good house guest should), because you sleep on a dirty bare mattress wrapped in a tattered, torn, stained blanket. 

    Mountains of dirty dishes. Bats in the house..And the smell of the 4 foot tall, 20 year old pile of their urine and guano collected in the attic..But we cant do anything to fix it, because no one can access the attic, even if we could stop thrift store shopping long enough to save the money to pay for it. But they are a protected species anyway, we can’t remove them, and the Health Dept will evict us and condemn the house if we tell anybody.

    Being forced to drive around on trash day and assist in loading other people’s garbage into our already overflowing  car. 

    crap stacked in the yard with tarps on top of it, so you can’t even visit with friends in the yard, it’s too messy too..plus, at dusk the bats will come out for a meal..Maybe the mosquitos breading in the standing water under the house (a  result of a plumbing problem we can’t let anyone in to fix)

    Toilets with a tiny bit of water and leftovers from the last persons use that do not flush properly, or having to leave some of your own last deposit because the toilet doesnt flush. Or touching the plunger that gets used by everyone, after each bathroom deposit, that has remnants left on it. 

    Cleaning a spot only to find dirty, torn flooring, or holes in the wood, or wet, rotten particle board hiding underneath. 

    Baskets, tins, cheap, ugly clothing that is outdated and doesnt fit..but history repeats itself! It will be back in style in another few decades. 

    Countless other things…I will be back

  • Cheese (or at least what used to be cheese) that’s listed as expired in 2003.
    “Don’t throw that out, it’s brand new. Never opened. And the fungus is penicillin!”

    Right, dad. Penicillin. And you wonder why I don’t eat anything you cook.

  • Guest

    Mushrooms in the carpet along the wall where the shower leaks. Being yelled at for using the vaccuum cleaner because “it’s too noisy” and “uses too much power”. Coming home one day to find the sink in the bathroom removed “because it had a crack in it and I’m replacing it”, then the shower taps removed a few months later because “your shower is leaking and I’m going to fix it”, then the bath taps removed a few YEARS later because “there’s still a leak so it must be the bath” only to never have any of it fixed “but it doesn’t matter because you can just use the ensuite” – which is off my parent’s bedroom and only accessible through it, meaning that every time the door is closed during the day you had to ask permission to take a damn shower, and sneak around at night. If the door is closed at night, forget it – you can’t take a shower because you have to wake them up. And when the door is locked for “privacy” you can’t even ask for permission because it might be “coitis interruptus” and no kid wants to know that. And when they spend all day in bed on weekends and holidays (like until 6pm) you can’t even go anywhere all day because you haven’t showered.

    Having a long lost childhood friend show up on your doorstep one day and having to ‘get rid of them’ because you can’t invite them in and you haven’t been able to shower yet so you can’t go out either (and you can’t tell them any of this). Feeling so crappy about it that you resolve not to let your parents ruin the rest of the day so you wash your face in the kitchen sink with dishwashing liquid (because your facewash is in their ensuite) and then realising you still can’t go anywhere because your toothbrush is still in there too.

    Not being able to invite friends in after they’ve walked to your place for an hour to drop something off, and finding out later that they were so tired and thirsty from the walk they were telling each other they’d be fine once they got to your  place because they could have a rest and a drink. The thought that they needed a rest never crossed your mind, you just had to get rid of them asap because of the house. They were too polite to ask for anything and had to walk a further 20 mins to the nearest cafe instead before heading home.

    Cutting or bruising yourself and tripping over junk EVERY SINGLE DAY, never having one injury heal before you got the next one.

    Damaging your clothes on the junk as you try to get past it.

    Everything taking double or triple the time to do because the junk is in the way.

    Even the 2ft by 3ft toilet room being used for storage as well as its original purpose.

    The garden littered with tarp-covered broken whitegoods that have been lugged home from other people’s sidewalks and are waiting “to be fixed”.

    Holes in the ground around the house that were dug to find the problem of leaking pipes etc and never fixed or filled, just left for decades covered by a few planks.

    Your mother trying to explain away your father’s hoarding one day with “it’s because he’s a handyman”….. and one day finding yourself cheerfully using the exact same phrase when some passing neighbourhood kids ask why your house is so messy…. and immediately wishing that one of the damn holes still in the yard would just swallow you up.

     

  • guest

    . . . As a teen, not being allowed to leave the house until your room was clean, but not being able to clean your room without throwing out some junk (which of course, as a COH you are not allowed to do!). So essentially, being held captive to a prison of your own unwanted crap 24/7. 

  • Tina a.

    -Papers. So many papers. Every receipt, every letter (even junk mail), anything paper was saved, because it was “important” or “might be needed later”. 

    -Boxes. We moved a lot so every box was saved for the “next move” or “in case we need a place to put things”. We had whole rooms so full of empty boxes that we couldn’t even open the doors all the way. They were stacked to the ceiling. Inevitably, by the time it came to move again most of them had been ruined by rot because of being urinated on by the animals. 

    -Food. Rotten food that she wouldn’t let us throw away. The pantry became full of rotten food, with the juices all over the floor and the shelves. It smelled disgusting and she wouldn’t let us clean it up unless she thought someone might go in there (landlord). When we ran out of money she ended up feeding us food from the dumpster behind our local grocery store. There would be mold running through it and she would tell us it was fine and then make us eat it, because there was nothing else. 

    -Animals. At one point my mom had over 80 rabbits, 14 dogs, 5 cats and a couple dozen goats among other animals. They would defecate all over the house and she didn’t care and refused to clean it up. She would put the dogs in my little brother’s room for a few days and when she took them out there would be urine and feces all over the bed, the floors, the clothes…and she just left it there and told my brother to clean it if he wanted to. That was the most devastating part of it, for me. Seeing my brother being treated like that. Every time it happened I would clean and sanitize the room as best I knew how, but I was just a kid too. So not safe. 

    -Bugs. One of the houses we lived in was completely overrun with cockroaches. I would wake up to find them covering my face, all over my body. I started sleeping with my shoes and coat on, the hood tucked over my face, just to feel safe while I was sleeping. In that house there was also mice EVERYWHERE and a rat in my closet. :(. I hated that place. 

    -Cobwebs. EVERYWHERE. 

    -Outside Animals. The animals that my mother kept outside would be left in feet of feces. The rabbit cages would have feces built up until it filled half the cage and there was almost no room for the rabbit. She always said she would “get around to it”, but I could only watch it happen for so long before I would clean everything. I felt so horrible for those animals. She let them eat each other when they ran out of food. She let them freeze to death during the winter and then just left their bodies in the cages. She would take out litters that died and just set them on top of the cages for the outside cats to eat. It was horrible. If a rabbit was born that she didn’t like, she force my older brother to kill it. He would cry for hours and she still made him do it. I cannot even…It was terrible. 

    There is so much more, but I’m just emotionally drained from writing this much, although it is nice to be able to express this in a place where I feel like I wont be judged. 

    • StephyB

      Smelly dish rags or sponges

      Finding the least dirty towel to dry off with after a shower.

      Cleaning my room to only have it become a new “catch all” space.

      No air-conditioning because no one was allowed in to install ac or central air. Fans everywhere, blowing hot air around all summer.

      Bathroom that has become a pantry for old cans.

      Piles of magazines everywhere.

      Losing school books in the clutter and having to pay for them at the end of the year.

      Picking up anything from a curb or trash that could be “useful” to someone someday.

      Enough VHS tapes to fill a blockbuster (I think she may have bought out a store). Some of these include random momenta on tv that seems important. Phil Donahue anyone?

      ….just scratching the surface

  • cd

    I am a child of a hoarder – my mother is still in full swing.  My father was one too.  So lets start with the lesser of the two evils, my dad.  His apartment was not only filthy, but loaded with junk – from the street, items the “less fortunate” people in his building wanted to “sell” to him for a few bucks, and newspapers, clothes, etc.  Drawers that couldn’t open, filled with papers and other junk, and roaches, roaches, roaches.  Yuk!  I think I saw his closet a handful of times.  Old coats, most of which weren’t even his.  I cleaned, sometimes, but the mess would just return.  As I grew older, I gave up.  I realized at an early age that no amount of cleaning would better the situation – he had to change.

    Hoarder #2 – Mom.  Oh boy – what can I say.  Living room, hoard behind the door.  Can barely sit – tons of books and magazines.  Junk.  Hallway, 3 closets, I could open the door with my back facing the inside, and still be standing straight.  Loaded from floor to ceiling.
    Front door.  Could never open it all the way due to the mount of either clothes or junk behind it.  Kitchen, the worst.  Paper bags with roaches, old stove with built in tray cabinet loaded with old rusty pans someone gave her that will never be used, scraped, dented, old pots, etc.  Never cleaned out.  Disgusting broiler.  Cabinets loaded with old cans, cups, plates, etc.  Fridge never cleaned out but we never had maggot or fleas – just roaches.  but that’s bad enough.

    Mother refused to buy a shopping cart, instead used a luggage carrier because it was “portable.”  Wouldn’t spring for garbage bags and despite all her “sewing projects” never sewed a f***ing laundry bag.  Nightmares!  Too cheap to “dry” the clothes for .10/30 minutes so we had to hang everything on a line – all 4 seasons.  I remember pulling frozen jeans off the line and putting them on the radiator and still being damp when I wore them to school.  Never allowed to fold or iron our clothes because I was trying to be “cute.”   

    Full cups of water on the shelves in the closet, along with plastic cups with plastic utensils in them and screwdrivers and other “wrong place-no home” items in the kitchen drawers and cabinets.  Yet, they found time to place doilies everywhere, and knick knacks around.    

    Saved every Entenmanns foil pan, even the pie pans with holes in them cause they can “still be used.”  Every container, cup, pan, etc.  Even when pans were too damaged to be used, they were kept.  

    I was stood over after being told to clean while she shouted, “leave that there.”  I learned quickly and at a very young age that this was a lost cause.  If I wanted a clean house, I would have to do it myself.  And so I did.  I spent my ENTIRE CHILDHOOD cleaning up after her.  I learned her likes and dislikes, and learned to store my personal belongings in a small container under my bed.  I wasn’t allowed makeup, nice clothes, couldn’t keep my room clean and as with other hoarders, had her hoard in every living space.  She would even drag things in from the street.

    It got worse as I entered my teens, she had more money and “lot” stores were the new rage.  20 of everything we didn’t need.  Moved into a house and within weeks couldn’t open the garage door.  I cleaned it out and within a month it was back.  Couldn’t take the life I was living and left and never looked back.

    2012 – shes in her late 60’s, has 3 storage units, living off social security, and hoarded out her apartment.  I am still dealing with this over 25 years later.  Rather, I am hearing it because I do nothing and have done nothing for years.  My kids and I went to clear out her storage years ago and found an old photo album.  She told me on the phone, “when you get there, don’t forget my bag of empty yogurt cups and coffee cans.”  There is now no difference in her mind between dirty, empty yogurt cups and a precious photo album, or a rusty tool, or still good envelope that was only written on one side that can be “reused.”  There’s no difference anymore.  I got the photo album and left all her shit there the minute I saw rat feces in the storage unit.

    I called her and told her that if it was important to her, she should clean it out.  I’m not getting sick or my kids getting sick or the hunta virus from rat feces because she wants to save used tissue.  I walked away and felt great.

    I was doing her a favor – I had not done anything in 15 years prior to that and have not done anything since.  

    Hoarders have big dreams and expectations with the things they accumulate, yet they never accomplish, even remotely, their plans.  The minute they are pushed up on to either clean it or use it as planned, they walk away.  

    My advice to other COH’s is let it go.  The memories will always be there.  Let it transform you into a better you, like it did me.  I am clean, neat, and try my best to take good care of myself.  It’s average, because I have to clean as anyone else does.  And sometimes I realize it’s time to donate some items or throw things out that no longer work.  It never had a hold on me like that, thank goodness.  But I still do resent having to clean after someone and of course, the standard inability to have  company, unkempt clothes, hiding, scrambling to clean when someone is coming over, not letting people in, late for everything, etc.

    You can take those life lessons and allow yourself to become the happy, stable person you want to be.  Remember your dreams as a child and work hard to live that way.

    All the best.

  • Monica 23 yr

    Old used
    menstrual pads and tampons placed in different rooms of the house. This had the
    most detrimental effect on me. I feel ashamed of being a woman and find
    kissing, intercourse or anything sexual utterly disgusting (no matter which
    sexes).  My mother always told me the
    mess was my fault because I was “an evil nasty child”. I wanted to commit
    suicide when I was 15. Death was seen as the only escape from constant abuse. Coming
    out is my first step to a better life.

     

    • cd

      Monica, Your pain and abuse you suffered is felt by all I’m sure.  I’m sorry to hear of your desire to commit suicide.  Please know that these are not your issues.  Focus on your dreams, if you can, and continually remind yourself of the positive – you don’t have to live like that.  Their feelings and behaviors are not you.  It’s going to take time.  You can do it.  All the best.

  • Dollylindalou

    I have tears in my eyes! I just found this community, so relieved I am not the only one! 
    The one thing that always made me laugh and cry at the same time were the stacks of Architectural Digests (1979-2011) she insisted on storing in my room. 

    Also, my mom’s “clever” way to store magazines so they don’t take up TOO much space. Take the time to rip out all of the advertisements! 

    Oh man, I hope I am able to talk my mother into getting psychiatric help while I am there for Christmas. 

  • Mae12541

    A whole closet of xmas decorations, lights, etc that never were used-but bought every year after xmas during sales. Never once did we decorate outdoors. Buying the xmas tree on xmas eve-then letting it stay until valentines day. depressing. no wonder i really do not care much for the holidays.

    • I’m glad that my parents stopped getting real Christmas trees when I was young, because by the time I was a teenager, the artificial tree stayed up for 3 or 4 months at least. Then by the time I was in my early 20’s and in university, we didn’t even bother putting up the tree. It was far too hard to get it out of the basement, and even if we could, there was no floor space to put it. I know exactly where in the basement the tree and decorations are, and it makes me sad that so many beautiful items are stuck down there (almost) never to be seen again. Bet when I do unearth them in 20 years, they’ll be wrecked anyway. That’s even sadder.

  • Winnie

    For many years having my trash ‘fossicked’ through (somehow that family expression neutralized or normalized the trauma).  She saved even used sanitary napkins.  One of my sisters had a key to her own bedroom, the only one who could stay sane (interestingly she is the one who has blocked all the people in her life as an adult, dislikes children etc).  I became a different kind of hoarder, it’s not obvious on the outside, I’ve only just understood it.  Shopping is also mixed in.  So much to work through, but it’s all about letting go of mental chaos. It also helps to understand that my mother did not choose to be that way.  Thanks for the site, wishing you peace and safety.

  • Brian

    I remember the leaking roof being “fixed” simply by putting a bucket under the leak to catch drips 

  • Believing that I am not worth anything to the world, just another piece of White Trash that’ll never make anything of myself.
    Friends that wouldn’t understand.
    Family that knew but never did anything.
    A father that left us despite his knowledge.
    Feeling lost and empty yet surrounded by so many “things”.
    Cockroaches crawling in my bed, squirrels in the attic, bats swarming my room at night.

    Waking up everyday wishing that I had just experienced a really bad nightmare, then hating myself for dreaming of a better life.

  • des

    jesus Christ!

  • laura

    I still loath cardboards to this day.

  • laura

    Trips down childhood memories, fighting to keep the hoard out the my bedroom, bathroom and living room. My favorite fight over these 3 rooms of space and peice was threathing my mother to bag up and burn anything she left out of place. I think I was 13. of course she threated with sending me away to extending family, which my reply was when can I leave this hell hole im forced to clean and clean. No response. This was the tipping point where I became the adult and she became the adult child I cared for. I left at 17 for 2 years. came back at 19 till 21. then I moved 800 miles away to breath and live. I returned every summer to clean out her house for 9 years. at 30 I decided I deserve to have my summers back. that was 14 years ago. Mentally I will never be totally free even after she dies.

  • laura

    No heat, sometimes no running water, Min. food, dirty house, dirty children.. oh but she always had money for church, crafts, helping others, etc..

    This was child abuse, wasnt it? yep and I surivied to have a better life.

  • laura

    at 8 thru 13 yrs of age I got crafty on how to make money from nebors, to buy the basic things I needed like toothpaste, brush and oh yea bleach, lysol. lol

    I still remeber getting yelled at for wasting my money for buying basic needs things. not walking to the store 2 miles away over 4 lanes of traffic at around 11 yrs old in the dark.

  • laura

    moldy, experied food, being yelled at for not eating it all. being sick from eating it. being called ungrateful, selfish, brat for being unhappy with our living conditions. for all the false memories told about how great a childhood I had, to relitives that had no idea.

    When I broke free from this childhood abuse, I tried to save my parents for 9 years hahaha
    at 30 when I stopped allowing them to abuse me anymore, I told everyone and have pics to prove it.

  • anoniroach

    Junk mail, newspapers, no AC in the deep south, expired food, trash being picked out of the trash can and left to rot in the sink (and now the tub!) because its “recycle”, cats that aren’t fixed, cat shit and piss, RODENTS (worst pest IMHO because the destruction they do), German roaches (at least the larger ones don’t breed in houses and can he kept out of things more easily), attempts to clean being rendered null sooner rather than later, attempts to clean also causing massive allergy attacks due to kicking up dust and mold, pyramid schemes and the garbage related to them, having to rely on the hoarder for transportation esp. when you need to go to Walmart or the thrift store, people refusing to bath despite the shower being more or less accessible, FLEAS, using poison to treat rodents but worrying both about how humane it is and about other animals eating the poisoned rodents, trying to figure out ways to control fleas and German roaches while keeping your pet invertebrates safe from poison, the list goes on